I know, I know…. It’s Been Too Long!

Several of my kind friends have pointed out that I have been lagging in the blog post department.  We started so strong!

Well….  Just to give you an update on what we’ve been up to for the past month or so…. On the life front, Wes is still busy with teaching school and attending grad school, amid bouts with various illnesses.  Right this minute she’s coughing up a lung somewhere.  She’s sounding pretty rough right now and feeling rougher…. But tis the season for cold, flu, and allergies!  I’ve been working at the church, picking up a little work on the side, and lending a hand with Charleston Pride organization.  I’m laying out the Pride Guide for this year’s Pride…. Which also happens to be the First Charleston Pride.  Pretty exciting stuff!

Stephenie Stovall: Best Dude Chick of Honor

On the wedding front…. And yes…. We’re just calling it a wedding…. It’s so much easier than the long, drawn out, complicated Commitment Ceremony.  So yes, on the wedding front…. We’re sort of in a holding pattern.  We go to Montreat for our annual trek to ARW the first week of May and during that week we’ll meet with our friend Aimee Wallis Buchanan (who is officiating the ceremony), for our pre-marriage counseling and also with Leslie McCarthy (who is the mastermind behind our decor!).  So…. Things will start moving again when we get to Montreat!

In other news….  Wes and I initially had not planned to have attendants, but after some thought, each of us asked one friend to stand up with us on our special day.  I’ll let Wes tell you more about the fabulous Matthew Myers, but for me…. Stephenie Stovall will be there on our big day!  Stephenie is an amazing friend and we have walked on some similar paths.  We have been able to share struggles, victories, and more than a few beers along the way.  These days, Stephenie is in grad school at Union Theological Seminary in NYC.  She’ll be traveling down for the weekend and I’m super stoked to have one of my best buds at my side.

Honestly, I feel incredibly blessed by the many friends I have in my life.  My sister Kristin has been a true friend.  She was the very first person I came out to, and has been nothing but supportive along the way.  But it’s truly impossible to narrow down the relationships to the ones that have been “most” important or special.  I have two sisters and amazing parents who are such a gift in this life.  I have my great friend, Anne Gregory, who is my kindred spirit and our friendship is so incredible to me after all of these years.  And Meghan Jones….  My best friend from college.  I am so lucky to still have her and Matthew and little Canaan in my life.  And there are others….  Friends from here in Charleston, friends from Florida and England, high school, church, and college…. And we really hope that our special day will be a celebration of our love, but also a celebration of the journey that has brought us to this point.  And the so many important people who have crossed in and out of our paths and made our journey what it is.  For you all…. We are truly grateful.  The journey is the destination.  And our fellow travelers are a gift.

D.C. Celebrates Marriage Equality

Tears of Joy

This coming Tuesday, Washington D.C. will see its first same sex marriages.  This is the first ‘state’ south of the Mason-Dixon line to pass this sort of legislation.  So…. Who’s next?

And the Caterer Will Be….

Yes!  Another big decision down!  We looked into several options and finally settled on one that both Wes and I are super excited about!  Drum roll please….. On the Fly Catering in West Ashley!  Woohoo!

For the past two weeks we have sampled some of their delicious food (oh yeah, it’s hard work, but somebody’s got to do it!).  Brannon Montgomery (one of the fabulous owners) and I sat down over a beer this past week and worked on our menu selections.  I can’t tell you all of the details yet, but here’s what I can tell you.  Their AMAZING shrimp and grits are on the menu and they (at least we think) really are some of the best in town!

Other things that are starting to come together….  Wes and our wonderful friend Deb Guess have been dreaming of the possibilities when it comes to decor.  We’re hoping (with both fingers crossed) that our friend Leslie McCarthy will be making the trek down from Kentucky to work her magic on the space.  I don’t know much about decorating, but I know that when Deb, Leslie, and our friend Lisa Diedrick get together…. It always looks amazing!  (No pressure, ladies!)

Which Came First… The Venue or The Dress?

This past weekend was a success! In a matter of 24 hours we managed to get a date, a dress (for me, not for Cheryl… although there have been some comments about putting her in a tiara), and a venue.

After a marathon shopping spree with my mom (in which I tried on numerous dresses made of enough fabric to clothe a small country) we ended up at a small boutique named “DeBorah’s Bridal.”  Pronounced de-BOR-ah.  Haha!  If you are a bride  in Charleston and in search of a dress, I highly recommend this store! I was allowed to select the dresses I tried on, with only one dress coming into the mirror-less fitting room at a time.  After my mother dissolved in laughter after seeing me in the first two dresses (think overweight mermaid in white saran-wrap),  Ms. DeBorah stepped in and chose two dresses… of course I fell in love with both of them!! In an attempt to help me decide, I was confronted with the questions of – what are you colors, what music will you have, where is the venue… I had no answers to any of these! Major Bride FAIL! So with both dresses in mind, we (Cheryl and I) picked up our marvelous friend Deb Guess (okay… another shameless plug… if you are a bride in search of some fabulous jewelry, go to Soul Whisper Arts) and went venue shopping.

As a side note… it’s pretty strange going shopping for a wedding dress as a lesbian bride. Since I’m the one that wears the skirts in this relationship, and has the dream of the big white wedding dress, we’re being traditional on that part. I didn’t feel comfortable coming out to everyone in the bridal stores – I have to admit I described Cheryl without using pronouns. Not that I’m embarrassed by being gay… I just didn’t want to make anyone else uncomfortable.

As Cheryl has already mentioned, there is an “it” factor involved. Since the first two places I loved (Tidewater Chapel and Old Santee Canal Park) were too expensive and booked (in that order), we started on the list Cheryl created. On that note, we each had a list, which contained pros and cons of each place we were looking at, dates, and prices (yes, she is that organized!). Needless to say, it was cloudy, cold, and pretty much the day you don’t want your wedding to fall on… at least we knew what these places looked like in the most depressing of environments. The first place we went, the Candlelight Pavilion at Miler Country Club, was the closest to the “it” factor we got. (Click on the link for pictures) It does come with tables, chairs, and little deck where the ceremony will be held… our colors (who knew we needed colors?) will be red, orange, and yellow.

Once we decided on the venue, picking the dress was easy. (I did drag Deb and Cheryl back into Deborah’s Bridal, although Cheryl protested… she doesn’t want to see me in the dress until the day of). During the return to the bridal store, Ms. Deborah asked Cheryl what she thought of my fiancee…she did state that she thought “he was a pretty cool guy,” with a straight face.   Cheryl has dubbed it the ultimate princess dress, which we know will delight one of our nephews (he’s in love with Disney Princesses). I have to admit, it’s not what I was looking for at all… I didn’t want a fluffy skirt or elaborate beading, or a train, and I wanted straps!!

This Is the Dress:

This Weekend…. My Parents Are Visiting!

Well, Wes has some great things to share from last weekend’s adventures!  A venue has been chosen (she’ll tell you about that) and that also means a date has been chosen.  Drum roll please….. October 2, 2010!  Woot!  I’m just glad to have a date and a contract signed.  *sigh of relief*

Right now, my parents are on the road, driving in from Illinois.  This visit was a bit of a surprise….  Well, apparently they had told “everyone” (meaning: both of my sisters, but forgetting to tell me.  don’t worry…. this isn’t the first time such a thing has happened.  it’s the curse of the third child.  i’m okay with it.)  So, in an hour or so my parents will be here.  We don’t have any huge responsibilities for the weekend.  We’ll take them to see the illustrious venue (anticipation growing yet?) and we may look at caterers together.

The big excitement will come Monday morning (yes, they’re staying until Tuesday!).  We’re going to Sweetsmith Bakery to check out our cake options.  Now, if you’re a Charlestonian and you haven’t heard of Sweetsmith Bakery, you’re missing out.  (Even if their webpage isn’t the best.  Hey…. They bake cakes, not websites!)  Sweetsmith is owned by our good friend Martha Feil and I am not exaggerating at all when I tell you that they make the best cakes.  Ever.  Seriously.  So. Good.  So…. Monday morning we’ll all traipse to her shop and try some of her delectable sweets.  Gotta admit.  I’m just excited for this because I love sweets and hey…. I come from a family who loves sweets, so…. Yeah…. It’ll be a good time.

This Weekend

Tidewater Chapel

So…. This weekend we’re going to drive around Charleston and look at the venues that have made our shortlist for our ceremony and reception.  Now…. Just to clarify…. The “shortlist” was basically made for us.  Because, when we took out all of the venues that were either already booked or completely out of our price range, well…. You’re left with the ones you see below:

Miler Country Club – Summerville

• Don’t think they’re actually available on any of the dates we’re interested in, but we’re throwing it into the mix just for fun!

James Island County Park – Edisto Hall

• This is a county park hall.  And…. Looks about as exciting as a county park hall.  BUT…. It has the price point of a county park hall and this is what we like.  We’ll see it in person tomorrow.

Charleston Yacht Club – Flag Room – Downtown Charleston

• Sounds snazzy.  Not sure if it is or not.  We’ll see it tomorrow as well.  We have it held on our date of choice, but…. Who knows?  I’ve learned that there is a certain “it” factor at play here.  Something indescribable, hopefully attainable.  And that “it” factor is all about Weslyn.  I’ve just discovered yet another way I am not like most girls…. I have not spent my entire life thinking of this day.  While both Wes and I are thinking about the bottom line, she’s also trying to match up the picture in her head with each venue we see.

77 Wentworth – Downtown Charleston

• This, my friends, is a neat little trick.  Look at this website.  That is the 77 Wentworth Events site.  Now…. It looks quite nice.  But it’s a bit misleading.  It’s not just an event venue.  It’s also Yo Burrito.  *stifle giggling*  We’ll see.  Not thinking it’s gonna have the “it” factor with the possible sombreros and salsa bar.

Tidewater Chapel and Reception Hall – Mt. Pleasant

• This place is beautiful.  Stunning.  Screams the “it” factor.  But….  You knew there would have the be a but.  But…. It’s way at the top of our price range.  Some would say out of a price range.  So…. We keep it in the mix just to dream and well….  That’s probably about it.

Sweetgrass Cultural Arts Pavillion – Mt. Pleasant

• This is at the beautiful new Memorial Waterfront Park.  It’s a cool little space.  Would require us to also rent a tent for the ceremony.  Not sure.  We’ll see it tomorrow.

Gold Bug Island – Mt. Pleasant

• Who knows about this place?!  It’s usually where everyone goes for an oyster roast.  Not sure it’ll come anywhere close to the “it” factor.

Robinini by the Sea – Folly Beach

• This is my favorite venue (today).  Who knows how I’ll feel tomorrow.  Only downside is they are already booked on our first choice of weekend, but….  Not our second.  It’s just a big house on the beach, but I think it could be really cool.

You Gotta Laugh!

Welcome!

Wes and Me

Well…. If you haven’t heard already…. We’re getting committed!  Weslyn and I are taking the plunge and getting married…. er…. uh…. committed!  So, we’re on the countdown!  I can’t tell you the exact date yet, but trust me…. As soon as I know, you’ll know!  (Think October 2010)

Here’s to all of the venue hunting, caterer trying, flower and color picking, outfit trying and wheeling and dealing ahead!